I almost feel as though I shouldn't be posting because of infrequency to the site of late, but here it is. This is a Mother's Day collage I made for my wife, and she loves it. It was simple to put together. Just gathering old pics of my kids, and trying to make something she would like. Each image is on it's own layer for easy movement. But when I look at it, something seems wrong. I would like to make it better.

Ed

The text should read "The mother OF my kids" instead of "The mother TO my kids". This is one thing that has already been corrected.

Ed

Hi Ed

Not sure how good of a "critic" or how much help, but I thought I'd at least tell ya my thoughts as I first looked at it.

First off...great thought, great kids, and great idea.

My reaction was, I think, due to all the B&W pics being on one side, it seems uneven or something. There seems to be alot of white space in the upper left and with the B&W pics clustered there it makes it appear even bigger.

I like how the 3 color pics seem to fill the whole right side and blend well, so maybe see what can be done on the left side to even things out??

Good work though and best of luck.

Ed I think a little backround texture or faded image would help too..:)

it'a a balance thing that's probably catching your eye, Ed. Mixing the colored and B/W would indeed help, but I think maybe I see the effect you were trying for in the grouping...the progression from B/W to color.

One thing in my schooling that is always good to follow where WE live (the USA and any country that reads from left to right like we do) is that the eye goes to the lower right, especially when there's something to read on the page. Check out ANY magazine ad, and look to see where they put the name of the product or company. Yup! Right there in that corner. Given that, ANYTHING there should look AWAY from the right, not off into it - your eye just shoots off to the right and goes away from the image. Flip the kid horizontal if he has to be there.

The light blue child would go better below the large color girl, and lead your eye back to the picture more. The girl's arm and the "cutout" in the light blue would fit together better too (this is assuming that you are going to keep the color balance much as you have it).

Watch the lighting too. Shadows are mixed in this pic, and that may add to the confusion the eye sees. Flip them horizontally to match the majority of lighing as needed.

I'd also move the text down so it didn't interfere with the picture. It looks like there is room - maybe move your name to lower right, center or left justify the 2003. SO hard to GUESS at what would look good in this regard. Your eye will tell you though. Go with your "feelings", because it it FEELS right it probably is!

GREAT pix of the kids, and so great that you even take the time to show your appreciation and obvious affection. So little of that in the world these days. I SO wish I were THERE, so we could slide stuff around and step back and look - laugh and talk and have fun with these great looking pix. Maybe we will be able to all get together somewhere and do stuff like that someday. What fun!

:wavey:

Wow! Excellent feedback in such a short time! Thank you all very much. As soon as someone said something, I immediately saw where they were coming from. The gaze from the subjects is something I should have thought of...leading the eye of the viewer. This was made on Mother's Day morning (yeah, I tend to procastinate :) ), so not much thought was put into it, and I haven't done anything like this for so long that thought is required! :( I don't have much time to re-work it now, but I'll certainly take all suggestions into account when I do it again. Once again, thanks for the help. Any other ideas? Keep 'em coming.

Ed

I like the right side and lower portion, but agree that the left side looks a bit empty. I don't, however, blame the b/w segregation. In fact, I rather like it! I just think you need one or two larger b/w images in the upper left and left side.

I'd also change the font to something a bit fancier.

Phyllis

Ed,

This is a great idea and it's hard for me to give specific suggestions without having the layers to play around with. (I'm having trouble visualizing changes in my head. :( ) So, I'll have to just tell you things that I would try if I had the layers in front of me:

- While I think the different sizes are good and add variety, I think that they may be a little too different here. Specifically the size of the girl in the upper right almost overpowers the rest of the image, esp. the B&W's in the upper left. I might try making the B&W's slightly larger - or cropping them in a little so that their heads are larger (but still fit in the space provided.)

- I don't mind the separation between the B&W and color images. I did a "40th birthday collage" for my husband last year and tried to arrange the photos in an age progression - youngest being the upper left and oldest the lower right. As a result, all of the B&W images are in the upper left - but it works.

- Perhaps try blending the pictures together a little more so that less white space shows between them - like the upper right portion of your collage.

- I would definitely change the background color so something other than pure white. Even a light cream color would reduce the harshness of the white. Texture and/or grain may or may not work. I'd have to see it to really know if I liked it.

- I don't know how this would work with arranging the photos, but perhaps make the text off-center. (I would also try a script font and perhaps a slight shadow under the text, but that's just me getting too fancy. ;) )

That's all I can think of for the moment. If you do get a chance to work on this some more, I'd love to see what changes you make. It's a great idea - and pretty darn good for putting it together the morning of Mother's Day! (I'm not giving you a hard time about that - I did the same thing this year! :D )

Jeanie

Ed, I agree with Jeanie that the pic on the top right is a bit overpowering - maybe you had a reason for that?? I also don't mind the b/w color separation - it works for me.

I also agree with Phyllis that the font you've used is a bit plain - a cursive font would probably improve what you're trying to achieve.

I like Gary's idea of a faded image in the background - the white *is* a bit dull. A shot of one of your gardens or a bit of scenery which the whole family (or more especially mother) enjoys, could work.


[how's that Mr Moderator - I didn't say one thing of my own ;)]

Jeanie and BigAl,

Thanks for the input. I tried playing around with it just a little last night. I tried flipping a couple images, like Blacknight suggested, but that seemed to change the individual pics so much that they almost looked distorted. The B/W and color issue is something that I've been thinking about since I made it, and I'm still not sure how I feel about it. The background color, with or without texture, is something that I'll definitely change, as well as the font used. It might be a while before I get to do much work on it, but I'll post the results and ask for additional input.

Ed

Hey Ed,

Myself, I like the basic idea of having the black and white on one side and the color on the other. What I'd suggest is to have the very young pictures (the toddlers) on the left and the older childrens photographs on the right (showing a time frame). Size I don't think is a relevant issue to any great degree. To make all this work, a gradual fade from b/w to color would give the impression of going from "the old days" to the more current pictures of today. I would also apply this thought to the background, that is, Using the pure white background with no frame (on the young side), to a slightly colored background for the more current pictures. I like your idea :)

Thanks for the reply. More food for thought. That's great! I worked on it, using some of the suggestions above. It seems to be much improved, at least to my eyes. There was one individual picture that I replaced. When I made it in a hurry, I didn't take the time to find the best ones I had. Anyhow, here's the latest. Any other suggestions are still more than welcome. Thanks to all who helped. Oh yeah,...one question. I tried to flip a couple of the individual images, and it totally changed the look of the original because faces are not symetrical. I didn't think the fact that the light was coming from different angles on different pics mattered much since it's no secret that they are individual shots. Any other opinions on this?

Ed

What a difference! I brought up both images to see the before and after.
The changes you made have given balance to the image. The transition from one child/time period flows very nicely. The BG color and texture are not over powering and compliment the overall image.

Thanks Jill. See what someone can do with a little help? :)

Ed

I like this version much better. It's more balanced, and flows better from one child to another.

Tyeise

Ed, this is a great improvement over your first version! :) So great in fact, that I can now see one other small improvement that you could make. ;)

I'm noticing that the "density" of the different photos is different. This is particularly noticeable in the picture of the boy in the top left. See how he seems more faded than the other pictures? You might want to do a quick levels adjustment on the individual images so that they seem so have comparable brightness and contrast - and have a little more "pop".

I love the background color that you chose. I don't think I would have gravitated toward that color myself, but it works! Font is much better too! Way to take our suggestions and run with them! :D

Jeanie

Hi Ed

2nd version is better, I like the flow of the circle and the sizes are much better.

I am not a graphic designer and I am sure there are a dozen ways to do this better, but I went ahead and split this up into layers and played with it.

There are a couple of concepts I discovered while doing this that I would like to share.

-found a color for the background that seemed to harmonize with the photos. Lighter in the middle to darker outside.
-By grouping the two black & whites together they form one object in terms of the composition. Also tried to seperate the colors for balance.
-Used curves adjustment on a couple of the photos to even out brightness and contrast
-Put the two sitting, on the bottom facing in
-Staggered head heights so that no two pairs of eyes next to each other were level with each other.
-Looked at head size and total picture size when resizing
-separated the black & white and color without making a triangle out of the black & white (Iwas afraid the eye would see the pattern and distract from looking at the photos), the black and whites are not level with each other (older boy on left and two little ones on the right)
-Used a font with softer lines for more emotion - left justified text to make it easier to read within the confusion of all of the photos
-have most of the photos touching each other to lead the eye around (I have seen other people do this kind of thing with seperate ovals and drop shadows, but I like this better)
- Was able to get the writing off of the center some for a sense of movement
- Used the girl on the left of the writing partially because of the straight right edge of her photo (since she was originally along the right side up against the edge) and partly because she seemed to facing in.

So much sweeter coming from you - but I hope you like some of these ideas

Roger

Ed, I keep forgetting to say - that picture of the little boy with the puppy is adorable!!!! :D

Jeanie

Ed, I am sorry I didn't ask if it was OK to do the montage before I did it. I forgot that this is the Critique Category and is a little different by design than some of the others.

I am pretty much a visual person (imagine that - probably why I'm here in the first place), the only way I could work out what my ideas were in any depth was to work with it.

Doing this for your wife is such a personal thing that I feel like I might have intruded a little ... please know that I did not mean to at all.

Roger

Tyeise...Thanks for the remarks. You folks did a super job!

Jeanie...Thank you. It's amazing what someone else sees that you don't see sometimes. Thanks too for the comment on the pic. If you like that one, I've got another that I'll post for you to do some artwork on.

Roger...Wow! You went through some trouble for that one. I think you have some excellent ideas. Thanks very much. I appreciate the comments from everyone.

Ed

Thanks, but I can't accept the kudos. That belongs to the group. You're right though...it was well worth the time and effort. Thanks to all.

Ed