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  #1  
Old 06-05-2003, 09:13 AM
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What's wrong?

I almost feel as though I shouldn't be posting because of infrequency to the site of late, but here it is. This is a Mother's Day collage I made for my wife, and she loves it. It was simple to put together. Just gathering old pics of my kids, and trying to make something she would like. Each image is on it's own layer for easy movement. But when I look at it, something seems wrong. I would like to make it better.

Ed
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  #2  
Old 06-05-2003, 09:46 AM
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The text should read "The mother OF my kids" instead of "The mother TO my kids". This is one thing that has already been corrected.

Ed
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Old 06-05-2003, 10:05 AM
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Not sure but...

Hi Ed

Not sure how good of a "critic" or how much help, but I thought I'd at least tell ya my thoughts as I first looked at it.

First off...great thought, great kids, and great idea.

My reaction was, I think, due to all the B&W pics being on one side, it seems uneven or something. There seems to be alot of white space in the upper left and with the B&W pics clustered there it makes it appear even bigger.

I like how the 3 color pics seem to fill the whole right side and blend well, so maybe see what can be done on the left side to even things out??

Good work though and best of luck.
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Old 06-05-2003, 11:49 AM
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Ed I think a little backround texture or faded image would help too..
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Old 06-05-2003, 12:54 PM
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it'a a balance thing that's probably catching your eye, Ed. Mixing the colored and B/W would indeed help, but I think maybe I see the effect you were trying for in the grouping...the progression from B/W to color.

One thing in my schooling that is always good to follow where WE live (the USA and any country that reads from left to right like we do) is that the eye goes to the lower right, especially when there's something to read on the page. Check out ANY magazine ad, and look to see where they put the name of the product or company. Yup! Right there in that corner. Given that, ANYTHING there should look AWAY from the right, not off into it - your eye just shoots off to the right and goes away from the image. Flip the kid horizontal if he has to be there.

The light blue child would go better below the large color girl, and lead your eye back to the picture more. The girl's arm and the "cutout" in the light blue would fit together better too (this is assuming that you are going to keep the color balance much as you have it).

Watch the lighting too. Shadows are mixed in this pic, and that may add to the confusion the eye sees. Flip them horizontally to match the majority of lighing as needed.

I'd also move the text down so it didn't interfere with the picture. It looks like there is room - maybe move your name to lower right, center or left justify the 2003. SO hard to GUESS at what would look good in this regard. Your eye will tell you though. Go with your "feelings", because it it FEELS right it probably is!

GREAT pix of the kids, and so great that you even take the time to show your appreciation and obvious affection. So little of that in the world these days. I SO wish I were THERE, so we could slide stuff around and step back and look - laugh and talk and have fun with these great looking pix. Maybe we will be able to all get together somewhere and do stuff like that someday. What fun!

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Old 06-05-2003, 04:11 PM
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Wow! Excellent feedback in such a short time! Thank you all very much. As soon as someone said something, I immediately saw where they were coming from. The gaze from the subjects is something I should have thought of...leading the eye of the viewer. This was made on Mother's Day morning (yeah, I tend to procastinate ), so not much thought was put into it, and I haven't done anything like this for so long that thought is required! I don't have much time to re-work it now, but I'll certainly take all suggestions into account when I do it again. Once again, thanks for the help. Any other ideas? Keep 'em coming.

Ed
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Old 06-05-2003, 07:56 PM
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I like the right side and lower portion, but agree that the left side looks a bit empty. I don't, however, blame the b/w segregation. In fact, I rather like it! I just think you need one or two larger b/w images in the upper left and left side.

I'd also change the font to something a bit fancier.

Phyllis
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Old 06-06-2003, 02:37 AM
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Ed,

This is a great idea and it's hard for me to give specific suggestions without having the layers to play around with. (I'm having trouble visualizing changes in my head. ) So, I'll have to just tell you things that I would try if I had the layers in front of me:

- While I think the different sizes are good and add variety, I think that they may be a little too different here. Specifically the size of the girl in the upper right almost overpowers the rest of the image, esp. the B&W's in the upper left. I might try making the B&W's slightly larger - or cropping them in a little so that their heads are larger (but still fit in the space provided.)

- I don't mind the separation between the B&W and color images. I did a "40th birthday collage" for my husband last year and tried to arrange the photos in an age progression - youngest being the upper left and oldest the lower right. As a result, all of the B&W images are in the upper left - but it works.

- Perhaps try blending the pictures together a little more so that less white space shows between them - like the upper right portion of your collage.

- I would definitely change the background color so something other than pure white. Even a light cream color would reduce the harshness of the white. Texture and/or grain may or may not work. I'd have to see it to really know if I liked it.

- I don't know how this would work with arranging the photos, but perhaps make the text off-center. (I would also try a script font and perhaps a slight shadow under the text, but that's just me getting too fancy. )

That's all I can think of for the moment. If you do get a chance to work on this some more, I'd love to see what changes you make. It's a great idea - and pretty darn good for putting it together the morning of Mother's Day! (I'm not giving you a hard time about that - I did the same thing this year! )

Jeanie
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Old 06-06-2003, 03:05 AM
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Ed, I agree with Jeanie that the pic on the top right is a bit overpowering - maybe you had a reason for that?? I also don't mind the b/w color separation - it works for me.

I also agree with Phyllis that the font you've used is a bit plain - a cursive font would probably improve what you're trying to achieve.

I like Gary's idea of a faded image in the background - the white *is* a bit dull. A shot of one of your gardens or a bit of scenery which the whole family (or more especially mother) enjoys, could work.


[how's that Mr Moderator - I didn't say one thing of my own ]
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  #10  
Old 06-06-2003, 06:56 AM
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Jeanie and BigAl,

Thanks for the input. I tried playing around with it just a little last night. I tried flipping a couple images, like Blacknight suggested, but that seemed to change the individual pics so much that they almost looked distorted. The B/W and color issue is something that I've been thinking about since I made it, and I'm still not sure how I feel about it. The background color, with or without texture, is something that I'll definitely change, as well as the font used. It might be a while before I get to do much work on it, but I'll post the results and ask for additional input.

Ed
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