Cynic or Sucker?

[Doug Nelson]

In a recent conversation with a friend who had been taken advantage of by a retailer, I pointed out he should be more cynical. I was surprised when he replied he'd rather be taken advantage of than be cynical.

I have carefully cultivated my cynicism, and take great pride in both it's height and girth. It never occurred to me someone might feel the same way about gullibility.

How about yourself? Would you rather be cynical or gullible?

[smak]

I'd rather be smart; well-informed.

[Ant]

Originally Posted by JD Spears

Hi! Still learning my way around. Can anybody tell me how to post a new thread?
Thanks, JD

See, if you bite on this one you are gullible.

Guess which I'd rather be.

[crazyfly1]

I did wonder about that one ant. How do you post a new thread to ask how to post a new thread??? But, I figured there was some subtlety to the question that I was missing.
For my part, I've begun to try to get a lot more easy going over the last 5 years or so. If it's some situation where I stand to loose big then I let the old cynic creep back in.

[john718]

Good question Doug, especially nowadays.
I have always been a cynic, my wife on the other hand is an eternal optimist, but it all seems to balance out. I guess it all depends on how you where brought up.

[CJ Swartz]

I think I can understand how your friend is thinking about the situation.

Many years ago, I started to become cynical in my dealings with "people in general", after being "burned" by believing some promises given to me by people who subsequently did not live up to their word. I found that not trusting people made me even unhappier than I was when I found that someone had disappointed me/ lied to me. Believing that people "in general" did NOT have good intentions made me unhappy every day - even when the people around me were being nice, honest, trustworthy, and honorable -- because I kept thinking about protecting myself against their possible misdeeds, and possible future breaks of trust.

I have since gone back to believing that all people are basically good, and that I will find occasionally that people betray my trust, lie to me, cheat me or otherwise disappoint or hurt me. When it happens, I feel bad; but the rest of the time I can feel good (which is most of the time) because I am surrounded by friends, neighbors, strangers who are basically nice, honest folks - until proven otherwise. Now, all of my years of living has also helped me spot lies, false/exaggerated claims, etc. sooner, so I am not anyone's patsy, but I am also open to helping a person whose hard-luck story sounds legitimate, and believing SOME of the ads that I read/watch.

[hawkeye60]

A pessimist is an informed optimist.

[Doug Nelson]

CJ's POV is (I believe) similar to my friends.

Ant's reply was to a post I moved to a thread of its own, so it lost context. In retrospect it is a bit funny, seeming to start a thread asking how to start a thread, but that was all on me, not on the person asking for help.

[Gary Richardson]

By nature and by experience I'm a cynic, however I try to be phlegmatic about it.

In general I try to keep my cynicism in check, reserving it only for when dealing with salesmen, insurance companies, builders, and anyone else with proven track records of insincerity.

[Markzebra]

Depends where you live whether you can afford to be gullible, or would prefer cynicism

[Janet Petty]

Isn't life a mixture of both? Are they mutually exclusive?

You forgive but you never forget. You get more "flies" with honey than with vinegar (but you also get bees too). There is a sucker born every minute. Treat others as you want to be treated. Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on me. Platitudes? Yes. Truthful? Yes.

I tend to treat people with a measure of friendliness, respect, trust, and "honey". I usually get what I want and make friends in the process. I usually get good service in restaurants and stores as well. But once burned, or trust is abrogated, forget it until amends can be made.

I know some cynics. They are generally wary and miserable. I'd rather be happy.

Thanks CJ for you words. Ditto.

Janet

[kvryland]

I think that being skeptical rather than cynical is better. Cynicism is a fortress mentality, believing that you should always expect the worst from others. Cynicism is not proactive; it is reactive. Skepticism at least allows you to proactively engage others. You withhold judgment of the person or his ideas until you prove their worth to yourself, but you don't automatically assume that the the other person is there to lie, cheat, or steal from you.

Remember the saying, "Trust but verify."

KVR

[LQQKER]

I dunno . . . I just hate people in general, then when someone does something pleasant for no particular reason "then" the cogs turn . . . what he's up to? what's in it for him? Is he a pervert making a pass? what's this going to cost me? Didn't I see him on America's most wanted? . . .

No seriously, I find life a wonderful learning experience. Yeah, you'll get burned a few times but all in all, people are good in general. It's when you don't learn life's lessons you become an easy target. Plus I like messing with people

[Kraellin]

lol, lqqker, i've never heard you so cynical before