| Zen and the Art of RetouchPRO Maintenance In case anyone ever wondered about my avatar (or was even remotely considering running their own large website) let me tell you how I spent yesterday while you all were getting the "forum down" error message: very loose paraphrase of a web-based support session me: My database is corrupt and when I run the repair utility it gives me an error. Can you determine the cause of this error? I must run the repair utility very frequently to maintain my site. them: Which database would you like us to repair? me: No, I need to be able to repair the site myself. them: You can repair the database by running the repair utility. me: I know how to repair it, but it's giving me an error. Can you determine why I'm getting an error? No one can access my website until this is fixed. them: I just pinged your domain, no one should have any trouble accessing your site me: My network is running fine, no one can access my site because the database has been corrupted. them: You need to run the database repair utility. It is located on your site control panel. me: I know where the repair utility is located, I've run it several times. It errors out and I need you to determine why. Many exchanges later: them: We have repaired your database. me: Thank you, but I need to be able to do my own maintenance. Did you determine why it was erroring out? them: You can do your own maintenance by running the repair utility.
To get the full effect, insert a 1/2 hour wait between each reply, end each reply with "Thank you, and please contact us if we can be of any more assistance", and have each response sent by a different tech, most (or all) of them from India. |