Critique the zombie?

[Maroon]

So, I've recently had a bad bout of insomnia and like any sane person, I chose to while away the night listening to experimental electro-pop and transforming a portrait photo. I believe the theme running through my mind was something along the lines of "Horror-Chic", though I should mention that the zombie in question is me, as the girl in the photo is far too glamorous for brain-devouring. I wanted pale skin, lots of heavy shadows, and an overall dark, polished tone. Keep in mind that I did want some parts--such as the hairline, eye whites, and mouth--to look a bit odd, but don't let this stop you from speaking up if you think they are poorly done. I am not easily offended and I'm sure I will be able to benefit from any comments you may have. The photo is by binababy12 at stock.xchng. This is my first thread, so please be patient with my forum etiquette!

EDIT: Now zombie-free! I think the title was scaring people off...
EDIT: Alright, so I can't change the title. Maybe people just hate clicking on links. Attachments ahoy!

Original: http://xs124.xs.to/xs124/08063/bina854.jpg

Retouched:http://xs124.xs.to/xs124/08063/insomnia193.jpg

[jam1212]

Re: Critique the zombie?

A few things:

There are some weird color casts going on with the skin tone. Perhaps these were on purpose, but I feel that if you got rid of them the image would improve.

The shadow on the top of the forehead is off from where it should be. Consider shaping it more realistically to follow the contour of the forehead and the shape of the hair. It could also use a little lightening, it's a bit dark. The highlight on the forehead could also use some toning-down.

There are a few places where the skin is too smooth, lacking any detail. (e.g. the tip of the nose) Try a different technique (d&b for instance) to preserve more detail.

There is some strange darkness around the mouth that makes it look like her skin is dirty. Try color correcting that.

Finally, some of the stray hairs on her forehead are a little distracting. Try cloning those out.

Hope that helps! Good luck!

[dataflow]

Re: Critique the zombie?

i like most of the retouching.

there is just 1 thing i think looks funny.
that is that you moved the specular on her eye into the middle of her eyes.
i dont know what it does but for me it makes her eyes look funny

[Maroon]

Re: Critique the zombie?

Thanks for the honest review! I'm not surprised that the colors are odd; I'm doing this on a low-end laptop screen which is about as far from calibrated as you can get. I'll work on everything else, though.

Here's my second try. I modified the shadows and did some things along the hairline. It's still a work in progress, but I think it's beginning to improve, and outside opinions are always very helpful. I'm hesitant to add noise in the highlights as I didn't blur them at all, but I may end up doing this on my next go. I'd also appreciate it a lot if someone could tell me what sort of color cast there is; I don't have access to a calibrated monitor right now, and I don't have any software to help.